(Miss Primm Blog)
In Tolkien’s The Two Towers, Merry and Pippin—hobbits of cheerful heart and hairy feet—meet an ancient being named Treebeard in Fangorn Forest. He is an Ent, one of the great shepherds of the trees, and among the oldest living creatures in Middle-earth. When they ask him about the Entwives, his tone grows somber.
The Entwives, he explains, are gone. Not dead—just gone. They grew tired of waiting, tired of wandering, tired of tending things that bore no fruit. They left the forests for cultivated lands, and in time, vanished entirely.
The Ents didn’t drive them away, not directly. But they also didn’t follow them. They didn’t adapt. They didn’t ask what the Entwives needed—or offer to meet them there.
So the Entwives disappeared.
And Treebeard, for all his ancient wisdom, still doesn’t know why.
It’s a fable, really. A quiet parable about absence, disconnection, and the slow unraveling of relationships that fail to grow. But it lands differently now.
Because in our world, the Entwives are leaving again.
Meanwhile, across the real-world landscape, something troubling is echoing through the headlines: a male loneliness crisis. Studies show that American men are experiencing record levels of isolation, with fewer close friendships and declining mental health. Many are bewildered, asking why relationships feel harder to find—and harder to keep. But like the Ents of old, some have yet to ask the deeper question: why does it seem there are fewer women looking for a relationship?
Short answer: fewer women are looking for a relationship. In the meantime, a rise in red-pill ideology promotes ideas like this:
The rise in single women isn’t a sign of failure. It’s not because we’re bitter, broken, or can’t “find a man.” It’s because we finally have choices—and we’re using them.
Being single doesn’t mean being alone. It means being free to build relationships that work for us. Sometimes that means a full-time partnership. Sometimes it’s part-time romance, co-parenting, or friendship. And sometimes, it means none of the above.
And the demand in the above post that we need to be quiet and soft-spoken?
Ridiculous.
Women now earn their own money. According to Pew Research, nearly half of opposite-sex marriages have wives earning the same or more than their husbands. And in terms of education, women have outpaced men for years—earning the majority of college degrees in the U.S. (NCES).
We’ve put in the work, we’ve built our lives, and we’ve looked around and asked: what are we really getting in return from traditional relationships?
Too often, the answer is simply more work.
As any woman who’s had to scrub around the toilet because your aim isn’t as good as you thinks it is knows, many of us are happier without a man living in our homes.
And there’s data to back that up. According to a University of Michigan study, having a husband adds seven hours of housework per week for women. Seven. In return? Married men take on only about one hour more than their single counterparts.
In heterosexual households, women still carry the bulk of the unpaid labor—housekeeping, childcare, and emotional caretaking—even when they earn as much or more than their partners. This is not conjecture; it’s been well-documented in sociological research, including in the American Sociological Review. We’re not just holding up half the sky—we’re holding the whole damn household together.
That isn’t partnership. This is expecting your female partner to be your wife-slave.
Nearly 70% of divorces are initiated by women, according to the American Sociological Association. That number alone should make people pause. We’re not leaving because we’re confused. We’re leaving because we’ve seen what settling costs us—emotionally, financially, and physically.
And we’ve seen enough.
If you examine the broader social picture—crime rates against women, stalking, domestic violence, sexual assault, financial manipulation, infidelity, and widespread failure to pay child support—it’s not hard to draw a conclusion that many would rather avoid: assuming each man commits just one of those acts, up to 70% of men do not treat women with dignity, respect, or basic kindness.
Guys: You are not the prize you think you are.
And let’s be clear: this isn’t about “hating men.” Most women still love deeply, desire connection, and appreciate healthy masculinity. But many of us are no longer willing to chase or tolerate partners who don’t bring anything to the table but demands and denial. The days of trading our freedom, financial stability, and emotional bandwidth for a lukewarm partnership are over.
We’re not angry. We’re just done pretending.
Done pretending that marriage is always a good deal. Done pretending that the bar hasn’t been on the floor for decades. Done pretending that emotional neglect, chronic cheating, or weaponized incompetence are just “how men are.”
We’re building lives on our own terms now—on purpose.
So if you’re a man wondering why women opt out, this isn’t a mystery. It’s a call to action.
If you want a woman in your life—not just beside you, but with you—be a better man. Bring honesty. Show up emotionally. Carry your share. Earn the respect and care you expect in return.
Because the truth is simple: we have options now. And that option might not be you.
